30 July, 2007
alright, i just hope this emo thingy will just get the hell out of me already.
it had ruined my days, especially yesterday. damnit.
so here goes, yesterday.
went to watch vacancy with evan, junjie and karen. nice show, interesting. lolls. went to meet weiru to do homework too. but things do not turned out that nice. because of what? because of my damn emotions alright.
things were like pretty bad. no elaboration needed. those who know, know. those dunno, dunno. i just know the situation was bad. thanks kelly, kuku and weiru. <3>
was like at home all day, other den going out to eat. sian sian. the headache still bugging me. aww. work didnt do much. im feeling bad.
anyway, one new. ME AND WEIRU ARE KINDA RELATED. lolls. FAR FAR FAR COUSINS. hahaha. so funny. we know each other since we were babies! and i even got two photos of my family with her family w/o our dads. haha. alright, i was lauging like hell when i know that. lolls.
nothing much. if the headache didnt "improve", i think im not gng sch tml. hopefully there will be no practicals den!
| till death do us apart<3 | 1:07 PM :)
27 July, 2007
RRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!
bad day bad day bad day bad day bad day bad day bad day bad day bad day bad day bad day !!!
I WANNNA SCREAM, SHOUT, RUN, HIT, SLAM, THROW and do ANYTHING tt i can to vent out this "frustration" inside of me.
what the hell am i in school for today. early morning, i think i saw THAT man who pissed me off totally. wad the hell.
physics practical, broke something and think mayb gotta pay for it. $15 for a len? dunno if mr lee is kidding not. nvm, forget it. i broke it, so i gotta pay.
a msg jus pissed me off. alright, its nothing much actually, perhaps alr in bad mood, so im not in the mood for that attitude.
I DON'T NEED YOUR ATTITUDE COS I'VE GOT ONE OF MY OWN.
mr chia went through binomial theorem. distracted TOTALLY. blah! like im never in the class.
sighs.
alright, i shall give all that a stop. perhaps it has gone too far. no more no more. no more of that kinda playing and fun. whatever. and it simply just hurt so much sometimes, when it just over one sentence or two. and the tears just drop when you try so hard to control. im sorry lydia, you saw my tears so many times. but thanks anyway!
i realised i've been that bad. all i think was just me. i've been too self-centered. if i've been being that way, i should accept the same way treated back.
okays, its time i change. i'll accept anything, any way.
the feeling of everything going against you.
why is this feeling inside of me when everything is going fine.
enough of ranting, enough of emo'ing.
| till death do us apart<3 | 9:09 AM :)
25 July, 2007
back home after a LONG day in school. stupid.
extra lesson stil not enough, still gotta stay back cos file not handed in.
lalalas.
im tired. but i think today's time kinda spent quite meaningfully. (((:
its like work after work. not bad ah.. got the sense of satisfaction though!
i didnt notice time passed so fast untill yesterday. dunno is which teacher actually said prelim is 4WEEKS away. i was like OH MY GOSH. its only a month away, and my result is like ... i got no comment.
and i seriously hope by then i'll be prepared for prelims and follow by Os.
meanwhile, just hopping this fire to mug wun cease. ((:
mr chua so nice to study organic chem because i say i need his help! hahaha. thanks!
tml gonna be a long day. straight after school going tution with chengyong. i need energy, focus and concentration.
GOD I NEED YOUR HELP!!! BE WITH ME, LORD.
Jesus, still, i know i need You in this major exam. help me, O God. <3
| till death do us apart<3 | 9:56 AM :)
22 July, 2007
im back home. (((: pretty tired though.
alright, i've been looking forward to today. and it turned out pretty well. (((:
met with qiqi lao gong and baohui stead this morning to go cut hair. it was pretty fun la, cos both of them changed hairstyle. hahaha! alright, they look good, really. ((: im tempted to cut short too, but duh. i noe i cant. haha.
me and qiqi. taken while waiting for baohui. love her! (((:
baohui. on the bus to west mall. loves loves loves! ((((:
headed to meet kuku and darl at je platform. i wasnt the last. haha. took train to go woodlands and met with weiru. three was in black except for evan. lolls. for ur info, we took the wrong bus and ended up half way gotta cabbed to csc. hahaha. anyway, had fun on the bus. laughters after laughters. blah.
instead of playing bowling, the four of us went up to play billard. i dunno how to play. it was hard. blah. hahaha. after that, had dinner which got me very full and went parkway walk walk. nothing much. simply yet pleasant and fun day. (((:
me with weiru. kinda very zhuai hor. lolls.
the three of us. (((: loves!
me with weiru the great & hwahwa the kuku! haha. <3
three of us again. muacks! 
me with kuku. the unusual face tt she gave! hahaha. (((: 
with weiru in the toilet. lolls! ((:
with colleen. in the toilet too! haha. ((: coll, you look far too tall! haha
last but not least, i took it for the sake of fun! hahaa.im back home earlier den i expected. haha. im guai, you see. weiru's mum was like so happy when i call her "gan-ma". hahahaha. she is so cute and funny can?! LOL.
tml going out with my beloved meimei. i know my homework is suffering, but the people ard are more important!
thanks peeps, everyone, for today. i enjoyed. nevertheless, thanks colleen's parents for everything at csc. (((:
HAPPY BIRTHDAY WEIRU. HAPPY BIRTHDAY COLL IN ADVANCE!!! ((: ALL THE BEST FOR YOUR Os AND As RESPECTIVELY! (((:
| till death do us apart<3 | 2:59 PM :)
17 July, 2007
initally today was a pleasant day. but in the end, something stupid ruined it.
first of all. didnt managed to complete my 2.4km run today. was looking forward to it, but in the end still disappointment. Mr Teo says my timing for first 3 rounds was very good, invested alot, so pushed me to walk even tho i cant run alr. my heart was in pain like hell, and my lung was like having a blockage man. walked for the 4 round and the 5th round i jus forget it. even if i run, the timing won't be good tho can pass, so what's the point? i rather run again.
listening compre. was pretty easy. alright, got confidence can score better den mid year. cos practically mid year during listening im sleeping. haha. nothing much, basically. headed home after that. im guai.
the worst thing. reached home, was using com. chatting online with weiru while my mum jus barged into the room and started scolding non-stop. it was like NO-LINK can? wad the hell. im so damn pissed can. dun wanna quarrel so jus shut up. jus nice weiru says she wanna go out study yet dun wanna study alone so we set to go out study tgt.
dun wanna stay at home, face the low atmosphere so headed je complex first. wanting to go find sze ting, evan and the bmt peeps. but who knows they are hiding at the canal there. man, i have a hard time, cos i called evan and she didnt ans. and im dumb not to call the rest when sze ting and kelly have their phones with them. blah. was so damn pissed, hot and tired tt when i saw them, my tears jus drop. sighs. weiru came, and we started on our work. i admit i didnt do much, cos i simply dunno. but thanks to xiaobai's and szeting's help too.
heartache coming back once again. just by walking home and my heart is having sharp pain.
yet there's nothing i can do with it. so, why cares?
¬ only mummy's thingy. another thing jus make me so disappointed too.
if it just matters this much.
day ruined. i cant be happy for the rest of the time of 16/07.
tml wil be a better day, HOPEFULLY.
| till death do us apart<3 | 1:45 PM :)
16 July, 2007
someone requested me to blog today. heh.
alright. these two days had been fun. i enjoyed! (((:
had the dance performace at ngee ann city yesterday. as usual, was sweating like hell. lolls. evan, szeting, weiru and kuku came down. ((((: alright, im really happy to see them. im like so paisey, walkin ard findin a toilet. changed, wash up and done! haha. didnt follow the dancers back as usual, cos i joined the gang. was kinda stoning for a while den headed cineleisure there. bought drinks and stand ard. nothing much actually. im zi-highing as usual. craps&talked, laugh&joked. haha. fun. headed to deanna's house after that. they were playing mahjong. i bring Yaxin "luck" ehh. haha. im her ghost. lolls. basically, me, weiru, kuku and kelly was watching tv. after tt kuku and evan swopped. tired tired. reached home at ard 12am plus.
today. met with sze ting in the morning. im sorry to be so late again. heh. headed to causeway point to meet weiru. den go her house. do homework and talked. evan joined us later. alright, i know im noisy ok? but at least the atmosphere wasnt stressed. hahaha. anyway, i must agree, they are MUGGERS. lolls. i will be greatly influenced by them in a POSITIVE way. (((: i enjoyed studying like this with them. weiru says sunday shall be our meeting time. hahaha. to mug hard now, to play hard after Os. ((: COOL. we had movie marathon after the work. watched mr vampire & the convenant. evan left quite early. and ohya, SZE TING & WEIRU gang up against me!!! rrraaahhhh. i didnt deny i did bully you guys, but you guys too bully me. somemore is 2VS1. say me, give me so many NICE names and blah blah. hahahaha. alright, weiru is now injured. lolls. blueblack, swellings blah blah. heh. sorry. but it was fun. ((:
i enjoyed this weekend. (((:
and im seriously looking forward to this coming saturday. haha. i really do.
we gonna go crazy, go high and haf fun okays, people? ((((:
photos taken on sat. ((:
me and my beloved baohui! sweets! she's loved! 
with my dearest baby! alright, i love her okays!
me and evan! ((((: nice! <3
with evan and weiru. aren't they cute? hahahaha. 
with szeting. she took this photo with me KINDA reluctantly. hahaha. love her! MUACKS
with my kuku! forever so nice!!! ((((: you're loved! 
weiru and evan. the siblings. haha. i love them big big time!! <3>
last but not least, the three of us again! ((((: <3
and is you guys, the gang, everyone, who brighten up my days!
times with you guys are fun and nothing else.
loves!
| till death do us apart<3 | 3:28 PM :)
14 July, 2007
im finally back home after a long day. duh, im seriously TIRED.
went ngee ann city for the rehearsal after school. hot hot. nothing much. everything was quite lack. but there is something which im kinda disappointed though. im really surprised to hear tt sentence coming out from A's mouth to say B. sighs. where's the respect man?
went to meet evan to go tution after the rehearsal. and yea, i didnt follow the sch bus back. saw jeff at je mrt platform. alright, having bump into him so many times, its the first time he came and talked to me. lolls. i was pretty surprise. get my number and yet can forget my name. duh. nvm, about a few years didnt talk alr. so, cant help it, i cant remember his real name too though.
as usual, she was late again. im like so damn tired can. blah. hungry yet no appetite. went tution, time passed pretty fast. headed to school's dere prata shop to eat. on the way, i simply fall aslp on the bus. at first is " quarrel " with evan, den dun wanna talk, den ended up i slept. haha! im full. yummy! i love bandung. hahaha.
walked home and here im blogging.
supposingly wanna slp early last night. do work and chatted online. do quite a no. of online tests with weiru. both of us quite similar la. haha. but but but, im NOT tt as what you said okays? u get wad i mean, weiru. supposed to call weiru cos her msg bomb-ed. lolls. but after that, she remembered i said i gonna haf a long day today so she cancelled the calling. hah.
and funny thing is, colleen asked me to call her. since i've alr finished my work, i called her. fun talk! haha. craps craps and still craps. i cant imagine how can i hear a word wrongly. ohwells, i get high easily ehh. laugh my head off man. lolls. blah. dun try to backmail me, you should honour your words, or rather you MUST. dun try to take advantage okays. lolls. and and and, im STILL as innocent as ever alright? bleahs.
looking forward to the conference with you two someday! hahaha. i think will be crazy man.lolls.
tml, or rather later 8 hours later, we gonna be in school preparing for the dance performance at ngee ann city. rraaahhh. so tired can. and i jus hope everything will be smooth and well, will put up a nice performance, anyway its the last time alr.
gonna meet the peeps tml! (((((((: loves loves loves! gonna haf fun!
gng off to sleep. energy-drained.
| till death do us apart<3 | 3:36 PM :)
10 July, 2007
okays. im feeling so shitty now. partially because of mummy, partially because of studies. damnit. was kinda feeling pissed or rather stressed up during maths lesson. can i say i just dun understand a single thing about relative velocity? i just feel like giving up, seriously. looking at the question, my mind's in blank. wth. wadeva. planning to do history. alright, it was supposed to be handed in today, or should i say yesterday. but i didnt do. so wanna hand in the next day. end up my ws all gone. can't do. sighs. thanks to baby she provided me with the question for the SEQ, and yanto giving me idea on how to start. done with that. now left with SBQ. hopefully im able to finish tml morning.
about two to three months away from prelims? gosh. how am i going to survive? seriously, i got no a single damn idea.
dunno what kinda feeling im having since just now. tears fell, yea i admit. i cant control. sighs. teach me how to cope, how to catch up and do whatever that i need to do.
surprisingly i received a msg from someone. okays. the only one who wil call me niang. lolls. first msg so sweet worr? but the msg ltr on still got threatening de. wth. so CONTRADICTING can? lols. and im clever enough to know you got my number from coll. (((: and ohya, im NOT demanding, you can ask ard. IM NICE OKAYS? lolls.
a nine minutes conversation wasn't enough. dun really wish to hang up, but perhaps not in the right mood to talk either, so mayb also no point.
| till death do us apart<3 | 3:12 PM :)
09 July, 2007
nothing much for the start of the day.
went serene centre with yiqi lao gong, karen meimei & my baby gek theng! hahaha. alright, it was meant to "celebrate" qiqi's birthday. alright, we just ate ice cream. yummy. (((: reversO and cookies&cream with the choco balls toppings. ITS COOL OKAYS? lolls. im so in love with it. ICE CREAM IS LOVE! YES IT IS!
taken just a few photos.
theFOUR. dancers rock okay? DANCE IS LIFE! loves!.jpg)
my sweetest girls ever! from left : my baby gektheng, my sister karen, my lao gong yiqi and me!
two photos with my beloved lao gong! i love her BIG BIG TIME! <3 (((:
alright, we kinda crazy okays. or should i say WE ARE CRAZY! ((((((: lolls. especially on the bus. we're singing, laughing, talking like nobody's business. when we jus board the bus, me and qiqi sing a sentence " oh hell yeah, i'm the mother ****ing princess ". hahaha. ohwells, we were jus listening to girlfriend okays. lolls. throughout the bus trip, the whole bus was filled with our laughters and voices! hahaha. yiqi's mummy praise us! hahaha. yeayea.
went west mall and headed home.
I LOVE MY GIRLS. YOU GUYS BRIGHTEN UP MY LIFE! LOVES!
MUACKS! i mean it when i say I LOVE YOU GUYS!
more hang-outs together, babes.
ohya, qiqi's birthday is on 10 july (((:
| till death do us apart<3 | 3:30 PM :)
07 July, 2007
i love physics tution!!! yeayea. hahaha. its was fun & interesting. not stress, not pressure. conducive place to learn and im not alone!!! hahaha.
ISLAND CREAMERY IS LOVE!!! i love i love i love the ice cream. hahahahha! yummy yummy! ohya, BEN&JERRY IS LOVE TOO!! MUACKS.
finally, everything is over. and i hope it really gonna be well. (((:
your words touched me. i never knew the things you said.
i never knew the "significant" of me in your heart and everything.
thanks my darling child. (((:
keep that matter close to you. its a "heavy" one, i know you're aware of that.
things ended well and peacefully. i hope it will last, this friendship will be strong.
never wanna history repeat itself again.
i really do appreciate everything today. thanks. (((:
loves! <3>
stomach still not well. i wonder what are doctors for in this world. the medicines dun seemed to work. craps. pain whole day&night. feel like vomitting. blah. wad the hell. lalalas.
&i jus hope everything will remain as now ( as wad im expecting it to be ).
everything, everyone good and peaceful. no unhappiness, nothing.
please don't let this break away, again.
dun take this peacefulness & joy & happiness away.
i just want things well between every one in everything.
this year wasn't good. me and baby agreed to this.
its already july. things dun seemed to be going really smoothly in this seven months.
what it gonna be like for the rest of the year?
who knows.
i cant imagine time passed so fast,
and all these while most of the things that happened wasn't good.
gosh.
ohya, baby, dun forget. HISTORY MAKER. hahahahaha.
& yeayea, HAPPY FAMILY~ <3<3
dance tml. i hope time will pass fast. haha. ((((:
| till death do us apart<3 | 5:05 PM :)
06 July, 2007
its actually all a lie.
can't believe it. dun wanna believe it.
im jus merely doing what im told to do.
and .. come all these. wth.
what else can i say?
im tired alr.
thanks evan, szeting, baby, peihwa, kelly&colleen. love you guys big time! <3<3<3
| till death do us apart<3 | 3:23 PM :)
finally today is over. i mean sch time is over. chem test sure die. like everything blank. wells, i didnt even study okays. blah.
mummy went malaysia. sian.
imagine stomachache with cramp. wth. its terrible.
got thoughts of what to blog just now. but now i've forgotten all about it.
ohwells, wait till i remember than i come back again.
&its that insecurity again.
indeed, im afraid.
perhaps is something impossible, but sometimes it does become possible.
whatever will come, will come.
| till death do us apart<3 | 12:27 PM :)
05 July, 2007
chinese Os oral finally over. okays, no comment. i think i screwed it up. blah. sighs.
nothing much today. had kinda some time spent with the same 3 peeps who went vivo and go crazy together. alright, do remember our DATE okays, people? DUN FORGET HOR! hahaha. im looking forward to it. hopefully we can still go crazy like tt time, or even crazier! OH YEA OH YEA. (((((((:
about yesterday. it wasnt a good night. sighs.
its a feeling of all hidden feelings.
not a good feeling, definitely. had a hard time before figuring wad this feeling is all about.
2 sentences keep appearing in my mind. i dun want it seriously, yet i jus can't get it out. i hate it.
[[ And so my road can never be cos yesterday is all that fills my mind ]]
this is a lyrics of a song. kinda feel it speaks to me yesterday.
kinda still feeling bad towards the way i actually felt&think. sighs.
i dun wanna feel the way i do either, serious.
alright, as i said, its yesterday.
after so much of the tearing at night,
im okay now, and i hope i really am. (((:
i hate stomachache or stomach uncomfortable. sighs. it's giving me lots of trouble.
| till death do us apart<3 | 1:54 PM :)
04 July, 2007
and i hate seeing doctor because they always say the same thing. rrraaahhh.
wad the use?
at least this one is better, asked untill so detailed. but still .. wadeva.
still thinking about it. take that out of me. im hating it seriously. to pretend that its nothing, its difficult. but still i gotta do it, i know that. wadeva. this aren't a good feeling. at first, i wasn't okay. but afterall, i guess i shouldn't be feeling the way i do. so pls, for goodness sake, get it out of me! blah.
if keeping silence means what you think it is, den i say i didnt say that.
tml Os chinese oral. what will it be like? hrmm.
| till death do us apart<3 | 4:56 AM :)
03 July, 2007
now is 7.17am & im at home. alright, my wish come true. i " dun haf " to go school today.
but the reason wasn't what i wanted! rrraaahhhh.
the stupid stomachache is stil bugging me since yesterday lunch. crapps. and mummy says she gonna bring me see doctor later on. can't possibly let it be liddat, if not every meal i take also wun be at peace. lol. wadeva.
can't sleep now. seriously i dunno what can i do now. argh. shall find things to do, if not today will be spent so meaninglessly.
inform me if there is anything importance!!
i wonder how's the rest? is it really someone wrong with the chicken? hrmm.
| till death do us apart<3 | 10:21 PM :)
alright, im back from marina AGAIN. has been going to since fri till today. only sun didnt go. lolls. ohwells.
went there with evan, emily, xiaobai, peihwa, kelly, weiru, colleen, karen & deanna joined us later. (((:
cabbed down to marina with xiao bai, emily&evan. was kinda late. the moment i saw weiru, i mus admit i feel like pinching her so much. lolls. she looks so cute can? hahaha. but she dun allow. saddened. went Jack's Place to eat dinner. didnt eat due to the daily stomachache. blah! watched death proof, which is a M18 show. ohwells, every single one of us managed to go in, when there is only 3 18 years people among us? lolls. we are pros okay? hahahaa. craps i know.
kinda gross at first and a little er.. i dunno how to say. haha. emily, xiaobai, peihwa, kelly, weiru left halfway and went dunno where, leaving behind me, evan, karen and colleen to watch finish the show. alright, behind was kinda interesting&funny. so at least, its better. went to play pool for a while after that. a curry puff is my dinner for today! (((:
ohya, jus a note for weiru ( if you did happen to pass by my blog ((: ). my shirt behind wasnt a towel or wad to clean hands okay? hahahaha. dun anyhow teach evan. and u can't stop pulling hor?? haha. you're drunk man. i feel like pinching you OKAYS? blah. pls allow me to next time. but dun hit me, i dun wanna end up in hospital. and i didnt know i became your niang overnight sia. hahahahaha!
alright, afterall, i had fun, i enjoyed. seriously! (((((((: thanks guys, more going outs ehh? lolls. nice day spent! loves! and i wish tml no sch, so i can enjoy even more. rrraaahhhh!
ohya, still got the secret practices right? haha. to you-know-who. hahahah! we gonna be pros in no time alright? lolls.
something its better to keep silence.
| till death do us apart<3 | 3:00 PM :)
02 July, 2007
God, here i pray.
i life her up into Your loving hands.
please provide a way out for her.
don't be hard on her, Lord.
show her the way, provide her the solution.
be her guide, Jesus.
God, and i ask of You to help her.
You promised in the Bible,
as long as ask, will receive,
seek, will find, knock, will open.
i claimed that promise, O Lord.
in Jesus' name, Amen.
| till death do us apart<3 | 3:32 PM :)
had kinda the same dream for two nights. hrmm, i mean the "idea" kinda the same. but the people not the same, except for the "main character". it wasn't nice dreams, okay? last night one, was like what the hell. i remember im crying so badly in my dream. hahaha! luckily i wake up didnt find any tears on my face. still feel so uncomfortable whenever i thought of the dreams. rrraaahhh! if today got the same dream again, i dunno what to say alr. humph.
went marina with evan, kuku&kelly. evan bought her shorts which she find very long alr. kuku bought 2 shirts too. walked walked around, ate at yoshi and went to play pool. ok, i admit ytd i played very very badly. me&evan paired, kuku&kelly paired. was on the verge of winning, kuku alr wanted to put back the stick. but wells, i didnt managed to goal even though its so easy. evan and me scream str away. awww. im sorry. haha.
hopefully today is a fruitful day! (((:
darldarl, pls take lotsa care!!!!!
| till death do us apart<3 | 3:05 AM :)
01 July, 2007
Daddy, would You just teach me?
teach me what im supposed to know, show me what You wanna show.
teach me not to judge. teach me to love still.
give me the patience, give me the joy.
Your Word has been sucha pleasant comfort to me.
fill me with the fruit of the Spirit. i need it.
take control of my emotions. im tired of letting it control me alr.
Jesus, at times when things wasnt gng okay for me,
teach me what to do.
i dun wanna be affected by anyone else, be it thinking or feelings anymore.
i know its hard to please people, in fact its impossible.
teach me not to be mindful of ppl's thinking, not to be control by others impression, no NOTHING.
take control, O Lord.
i desperately need the fruit of the Spirit.
thanks for showing me that on wed.
and when i ask, You assured me.
and when i pray, You heard me.
i've made the step. ((:
i love the hokkien mee yesterday. thanks for introducing me that! haha. DELICIOUS!! yummy. poor you gotta bear with the chilli. =X i miss that place too. rrraaahhhhh! only went there for a short time. gotta go there stay longer next time!!! (((((:
i got so many things to buy. but im short of money. man, i know im kinda materialistic. haha. pardon me. money wun be able to take control of me still. heh. and i know i cant be MATERIALISTIC.
i bet i will be greatly deprived of fun&laughter and everything that will get me high&crazy for these 3 months or so. with all the remedials, pratically everyday (hopefully fridays will be freed soon), how is that possible to have all that once again? perhaps after prelim, after Os. now and then will have, but its never sufficient for me. blah. ohwells, its will be super surprising if one day i say i love studies. that is like a total NO NO for me. grace mummy&khailoon 女人 were kinda surprised that im attending tutions. hahaha. im surprised too, seriously. bleahs.
im looking forward to POST Os. i gonna haf lots lots lots & lots of fun man. there are so many things awaiting. (((((((: the thoughts of the fun make me smile. hahahaha!
focus is only one TWO things now. that's my priority. ((((: do well in both. give my best&give me all. mark my words. ((((((: no regrets, nothing in future. HAHAHA.
discipline, ability, everything that is needed for these two, please fall on me!!! (:
<3<3<3
| till death do us apart<3 | 5:09 AM :)
