31 January, 2007
yea, finally a day of no hw. heh.
got ah, a maths, but the prob is i dun even noe needa do wad qns.
so .. lalala.
chemistry test, difficult!
sure flunk. aww.. first chemistry test for 2007, yet ...
haha.
nice weather,
with the moon out so early,
with the stars hanging up high in the sky.
its just so nice,
lying down and watch.
wind blowing non-stop,
side by side,
in your embrace,
jus wanna fall into a deep sleep.
don't bear to leave this moment,
though can't, no choice ..
its still a sweet day afterall. (:
loves.misses.
jet'aime.
<3
| till death do us apart<3 | 1:52 PM :)
29 January, 2007
a vulnerable week is coming in 2 hours time.
alot of uncertainty and "fear".
but still,
i wont think much, cos i promised you w/o knowing that i do. haha (:
i will not =((= for YOU!
be strong. heh.
i will end this unhappy thing today before 12am. dun wanna bring it forward to this coming week,
like wad i said, it is a vulnerable week, alot of things might affect alot, even the slightest thing.
i once told u how i think and feel,
u told me u dun mind, but actually u mind alot.
u didnt tell mi what can i do,
jus keep saying its alrite.
everything u also didnt wanna say, what can i do?
other ppl i can't control what they wanna do,
but what had it got to do with me?
i admit sometime i do show,
but tt is everyone also will ah, wont you too?
i dunno there is wad else,
i noe its more than this.
it is not really affecting anymore.
it used to hurt upon hearing this,
but now,
jus a little bothered, but not hurting,
how come?
isit bcos im numb alr?
or i alr expected this?
why does things got to be so complicated?
sighs, i jus dun understand.
this shall end here,
wadeva it is.
alrite, nth much bah.
gonna finished up everything tt i wanna do.
heh.
received a swt yet complicated yet special msg. heh. (:
God,
search me, O Lord.
need Your guidance and Your touch.
need Your direction and Your love.
replenish and fill me of anything that im lacking.
love You, Jesus.
amen.
| till death do us apart<3 | 2:00 AM :)
28 January, 2007
i thought i gonna lose it all.
but God, u gave it all back to me just like that.
thank You, Jesus.
i will cherish this chance, i will do it all for You. (:
it didnt come straight away at one go anymore.
alittle and a little, making me feeling very uncomfortable.
aww..
alright, was rather late for the mtg/ discipleship this morning. sorry ah.
cant really concentrate ah.
during cell group, played wacko. not bad ah. but the point is, this is the FIRST time i kena so many times. mind wasnt functioning very well. something is missing ah. haha. i myself kena alot of times, ppl sitting in front of me, who need mi to protect, also very cham. aww.. sorry.
during service, eyes very pain, irritating, dry. lalala. cant focus too. very tired also. i dun understand why i can be tired lor. lolls. wadeva lars.
seemed like wadeva i do today also cant concentrate well. wahaha!
i jus seemed so tired, with my eyes irritated, for no reason!
bleah~
" if you wanna dance for Me, don't dance for others "
God, i thank You for telling me this through rosline. i dun really understand, God what do You mean? Lord, show it to me, help me understand.
| till death do us apart<3 | 2:54 PM :)
27 January, 2007
alright, came home rather early today. haha! about 2pm?
hrmm, guai ehh?
lolls.
reached home. mum called me ask mi go out with her. duh, was very tired. but well, anything lor. at first was thinking abt going back to sch to help out at the sec3 camp, but enough ppl le, so didnt go.
went jp. and one thing, was so so so surprise to see a person. haha! 2 years didnt see le. i give u this look, u give me this look, and we jus started " laughing ". hah! didnt change much. but it was really a surprise to see him.
nth much to do.
racking my brain.
i still dun noe.
lalala.
time is running out ah!
haha!
| till death do us apart<3 | 9:55 AM :)
26 January, 2007
this week gonna end very soon.
wad will next week be like?
what will be happening for the full of next week?
hrmm ..
the "next week" one year ago wasnt a good one,
in fact, it just hell man.
lalala.
when i say its you, i mean it.
not him, not her, not anyone.
cast tt feeling, tt thought aside.
break everything that's hindering.
you are the one, and only one.
believe me, when i say to you,
i love you, and i need you.
(:
hrmm, suddenly thought of tt day. haha! dunno how come, but it's just so cold, yet sweet. so down, yet secure.
seemed to be tired everyday.
give me strength, O Lord!
| till death do us apart<3 | 3:54 PM :)
25 January, 2007
superteen is over.
well, i think its pretty cool.
though tiring, sometimes quite sian,
but overall i think its fun!
second and third day of the superteen was awesome.
just something that no one expected bah.
there is learnings, songs, jokes, scoldings and even tears.
haha!
learnt many things, not a bad experience.
(:
aimed for 7 "A"s too. sound impossible for me eh?
but well, BELIEF. haha!
and with God's help, all things are possible.
i do my best, God will do the rest! (:
its you,
nobody, nothing else.
| till death do us apart<3 | 4:35 PM :)
23 January, 2007
went for the first day of superteens.
at first was stil quite fun.
but as time passed,
its getting tiring ...
it acted up again, in the freezing cold room.
aww ... its terrible .
dunno how to survive thru tml and wed de.
so long ah.
though time seemed to pass pretty fast,
but stil,
it jus seemed to be so energy-draining.
sighs.
still got the group thingy thing need to do.
dismiss so late how to do group thingy?
somemore got wad test tml..
aww ... sian lar!
was so weared out, so dead.
longing for a deep sleep.
but how m i supposed to slp now?
certain things said are jus so hurting.
i dun seemed to be able to do much.
know my heart, and know me.
my one and only choice.
nothing else matters.
| till death do us apart<3 | 3:39 PM :)
21 January, 2007
a few days didnt update ler. not a very good week ah.
hrmm..
alright, had been trying to find nice blogskins.
but didnt managed to find one satisfied de last nite.
lalala.
seemed to haf alot of things undone.
but the time is not waiting for me.
aww .. so many desires, but so little time.
sometimes im really pissed with emotions.
it can simply just get so mixed up.
so much so,
i seemed to need so much of assurance, and so often.
siao liao.
wadeva la, feelings are not always accurate. lolls.
i couldn't get high P&W.
i couldn't concentrate and focus even for a little bit.
i dunno why.
not setting a good example, as said.
im sorry, Daddy.
sometimes,
thoughts and thoughts of losing something so dear keep coming to me.
yes, im scare, im uncertain.
yes, i do need assurances.
you need to know how important you are to me.
you need to know how dear you are to me.
you need to know how much i need you.
certain things which i said,
i mean it from the bottom of my heart, believe me.
hold my hand, tell me you'll never let me go.
im afraid of losing you, yes i do.
if one day thing changes,
will u go? or will u stay?
what more will u say, at the very end of the day?
wad a random post for today. jus blog abt anything that comes into my mind.
| till death do us apart<3 | 4:25 PM :)
17 January, 2007
this time, it really makes me think hard.
what choice do i haf?
to give up on either one, sacrifice either one's time,
or m i still able to jus continue with both?
Daddy, i will do as what You say. (:
walked home today,
wishing that you were with me. really in a dilemma.
though i wish, but i didnt wanna ask.
if only at the moment you were by my side.
advices, suggestions, assurance i need.
while walking,
decided to ask God for assurance, for directions of what should i do.
i got the ans to my qns, but i dunno if it is by coincidence or what. its just seemed so true.
and yea, u did come down to find me. thanks. it helps lots. (: appreciate it.
thanks Daddy.
Daddy,
show my Your way.
didnt wanna questione much.
will go, will do whatever You say.
show me, O Lord.
send me more assurance.
You know how to speak to me,
so that i know and can hear.
O Lord, jus tell me so.
what i need is Your words.
| till death do us apart<3 | 2:25 PM :)
16 January, 2007
another day had passed jus like that.
wad a tiring day, i dunno why.
lessons was quite slack today.
hrmm ....
thought today should be fun and happy? lalala.
nothing much happened today. jus too tired.
sighs.
was rather looking forward to tml.
but now turned out got the dunno wad learing journey for all sec4s. duh..
oh ya, last but not least, once again.
happy anniversary! (:
iloveyou. muacks!
wahahah!
| till death do us apart<3 | 12:23 PM :)
15 January, 2007
firstly for today's post.
BIG THANKS TO DRU FOR THE POEM.
ITS SO NICE OF YOU.
ITS ENCOURAGING & I REALLY LIKE ALOT. (:
THANKS DRU.. APPRECIATE IT!
-
when it started, it continues for days.
jus so random, anytime, anywhere.
-
how come nowadays like nothing to blog about?
or rather there wasnt anything i wanna blog about.
seemed to haf alot of things,
but whenever i come into this page,
its blank.
lalala.
-
give me strength, O Lord.
give me grace, give me the patience.
may i jus bring out Your love in every situations.
may people jus see You in me.
i need Your guidance for everyday.
i need Your love, always.
i want to be in Your presence, every single day.
help me, Daddy.
You know i need You.
You see my heart, and everything that's inside of me.
You see the tears that's falling.
You know how much it has pressed me down.
You know it all.
send me assurance, Daddy.
-
some things not allowed to, some things dun want to.
im gng crazy.
| till death do us apart<3 | 2:41 PM :)
11 January, 2007
sometimes things might not go right.
sometimes things might get so ridiculous.
wadeva it is,
God is still in control of everything.
Help me put all my faith and trust in You, Daddy.
-
if saying out all these will make one "goes wrong",
i rather keep it all silent to myself,
no matter how hard or terrible it might be.
all i want is everything to be well and in order.
-
i realised lessons are long. everytime after lessons i will be so shagged. sighs. nvm, who ask this year to be an O'level year. lalala.
went to see the rehearsal for this sat, ccas display. dancers, well done. nicely presented the Mr.Q. yea, i was disappointed tt i didnt join in, backed out so last min. but well ... still got another chance. js that, its the first time presenting Mr.Q and im unable to perform. nvm ..
dance dance dance. how strong is my passion for dance? haf dance really become part of my life? how well did i actually excel in dance? i dunno. i wanna learn different kind of dances, but i dunno if im meant to be a dancer. and im not given a chance to learn much. surprisingly, dere was even one time when i really feel like giving up in dancing. will dere be a day when i really forgo?
will there be a day when everything in my life jus change?
lalala. seemed to question too much. haha.
dunno what else to blog about.
realised like there is alot of things to pray about.
yea, prayer works wonders! (: AMEN.
Jesus loves me,
I love Jesus.
love that never run dry<3
-
help me to stand each day, O Lord.
live by faith and not by sight.
lead me step by step each day.
i will follow You, Jesus.
| till death do us apart<3 | 4:38 PM :)
08 January, 2007
everything is over, i suppose?
lalala. i dunno.
-
things might go wrong, everything might change.
But Daddy, its You i run to, its You i cry out to.
its during all these that i realised i really really need You.
its when i know and assure a million times that i cant live w/o You.
You've been so good, so lovely to me.
You've help me through so much.
i dunno how to express my thanks to You.
Daddy, You want my affection, my love,
yes Lord, i give them all to You, 100% genuine and true.
Your love for me is everlasting, so will my love for You.
what You've done for me, and what You'l do for me,
is what no one else can do.
You've given me so much, so many wonderful things and people.
i love them all.
You're above all name,
You're the mighty worthy one,
You're Jesus.
I LOVE YOU.
-
loves.misses.
| till death do us apart<3 | 4:35 AM :)
06 January, 2007
it is just a dream or its for real?
its so scary, and it seemed so real.
tears was almost falling out,
i was at a lost.
i couldnt speak, or do anything.
but in the end,
hopefully everything was well.
-
alright, sch haf reopen, OBVIOUSLY. these few days keep trying to finish up holiday homeworks. yep, almost all completed. but mostly all not i do de lar, especially maths. =X this year seemed to be so " scary '? every single day also will hear the word " O Level " coming out from teacher's mouth. LOL. i noe this year O level lar, no need keep reminding. very stressful de leh. haha!
anyway, i dunno how well i gonna do for this year. my chemistry especially. hopefully now with both miss kho and miss lee, result wil shoot up. same goes for all the other subjects la. haha. jiayous jiayous.
sze ting came back from overseas, bought mi a same apple thingy. yep, it is very nice and cute! thanks dardar!
had been sleeping late these few days though sch reopens. sighs. im tired. lalala.
-
seriously, i dunno how come im bothered by tt so much.
hopefully im jus thinking too much or wadeva.
lalala. the feeling is jus not right. and i dun want this kind of feeling. SHOOT!
some things which i dun wanna be bothered, but it jus do.
some things i choose to think about it, cos it jus matters so much.
what m i supposed to do now?
or rather, what can i do now?
i dunno how to. im afraid to.
thanks for the 3 nice souls who were with me tt night at the playground. (:
appreciate u guys.
-
Daddy, i need Your grace. i need Your touch right now.
shower me once again with love, Your everlasting love.
show me the directions and guide me through the way.
tell me wad's right and show me wad's wrong.
i may not know wad's happening,
but Daddy, u know everything,
u see everything.
i realised how much how much i need You so.
help me be someone that You wanted me to be.
help me be someone which You'll be please with.
Beautiful One, i love
Beautiful One, i adore
Beautiful One, my sould must sing
yes Lord, You're the beautiful One.
You changed my life and make mi whole.
You filled the vacuum in my heart.
what more can i say or do?
but to love and live for You, Jesus.
in everything i do, i do it for You.
| till death do us apart<3 | 8:02 AM :)
